Windows Of Saint Joseph

Autism is a house without doors but sometimes a window is opened. For me that window was religion. Too early in my life I was blessed to perceive religion as it really is, and though in the very depth of my self I knew that “child-abuse” didn’t apply in this case, the images that Islam and the Inquisition evoke in me were almost too horrible to bear. In a word, I was terrified of religion. How little we know what a religious experience really is – even our own. Certainly, after two years of meetings and daily masses, there was no sense of reality that my mind could provide for the content of Catholic doctrines, thereby invalidating them. I had never really noticed what the rules of Catholicism were and what typical Catholics experienced. However far I fall short of their understanding, I think my real trouble was I didn’t have a theory of mind; thus, I concluded that everybody, including the priest who had to celebrate mass, experienced what I did. The theory of the mind runs very deep. It underscores the big words: the kinds of words that make consciousness possible: self, community, freedom itself. I have indeed become conscious of my freedom. How far down would I need to dig to discover the Risen Christ?